Todays joke!!!!! - Page 177
Hello and welcome to our community! Is this your first visit?
Register
+ Reply to Thread
Page 177 of 187 FirstFirst ... 77127167175176177178179 ... LastLast
Results 3,521 to 3,540 of 3723
  1. #3521
    Prodigious Member compo batty's Avatar
    Join Date
    2nd Jan 2017
    Location
    Under the stairs.
    Posts
    645
    " Political Correctness is a doctrine, fostered by a delusional, and promoted by an unscrupulous media, which holds forth the proposition that it is entirely possible to pick up a tyrd by the clean end". Jaguar Sovereign 1998 V8 4.0.

  2. Remove Advertisements
    JagInfo.org
    Advertisements
     

  3. #3522
    Prodigious Member compo batty's Avatar
    Join Date
    2nd Jan 2017
    Location
    Under the stairs.
    Posts
    645
    " Political Correctness is a doctrine, fostered by a delusional, and promoted by an unscrupulous media, which holds forth the proposition that it is entirely possible to pick up a tyrd by the clean end". Jaguar Sovereign 1998 V8 4.0.

  4. #3523
    Prodigious Member Nige999's Avatar
    Join Date
    21st Jul 2016
    Location
    Midlands
    Posts
    597
    First name
    Nige
    Yossel Zelkovitz worked in a Polish pickle factory.

    For many years he had a powerful desire to put his penis in the pickle slicer. Unable to stand it any longer, he sought professional help from the factory psychologist.

    After six months, the therapist gave up. He advised Yossel to go ahead and do it or he would probably never have any peace of mind.

    The next day he came home from work very early. His wife, Sacha, became alarmed and wanted to know what had happened. Yossel tearfully confessed his tormenting desire to put his penis in the pickle slicer. He went on to explain that today he finally went ahead and did it, and he was immediately fired.

    Sacha gasped and ran over to her husband. She quickly yanked down his pants and shorts only to find a normal, completely intact penis. She looked up and said, "I don't understand. What about the pickle slicer?"

    Yossel replied, "I think she got fired, too."
    Current XFR-S 5.0 in Ultimate Black.... Previously 3.0 D S Portfolio
    🖐😜👍

  5. #3524
    Prodigious Member compo batty's Avatar
    Join Date
    2nd Jan 2017
    Location
    Under the stairs.
    Posts
    645
    023940706b30f5dc48ae3e8d33421328.jpg
    Should have gone to specsavers lol.
    " Political Correctness is a doctrine, fostered by a delusional, and promoted by an unscrupulous media, which holds forth the proposition that it is entirely possible to pick up a tyrd by the clean end". Jaguar Sovereign 1998 V8 4.0.

  6. #3525
    Prodigious Member compo batty's Avatar
    Join Date
    2nd Jan 2017
    Location
    Under the stairs.
    Posts
    645
    " Political Correctness is a doctrine, fostered by a delusional, and promoted by an unscrupulous media, which holds forth the proposition that it is entirely possible to pick up a tyrd by the clean end". Jaguar Sovereign 1998 V8 4.0.

  7. #3526
    Prodigious Member compo batty's Avatar
    Join Date
    2nd Jan 2017
    Location
    Under the stairs.
    Posts
    645
    Fun and games to play at home, when retired:
    c0d3482498a86b530d8023725550555c.jpg
    " Political Correctness is a doctrine, fostered by a delusional, and promoted by an unscrupulous media, which holds forth the proposition that it is entirely possible to pick up a tyrd by the clean end". Jaguar Sovereign 1998 V8 4.0.

  8. #3527
    Prodigious Member compo batty's Avatar
    Join Date
    2nd Jan 2017
    Location
    Under the stairs.
    Posts
    645
    " Political Correctness is a doctrine, fostered by a delusional, and promoted by an unscrupulous media, which holds forth the proposition that it is entirely possible to pick up a tyrd by the clean end". Jaguar Sovereign 1998 V8 4.0.

  9. #3528
    Executive Member (Head of Forum Security) Dave's Avatar
    Join Date
    25th Jun 2012
    Location
    The 2:0ltr club founder
    Posts
    16,291
    Blog Entries
    6
    First name
    Dave

  10. #3529
    Super Moderator wilf's Avatar
    Join Date
    3rd Jul 2012
    Location
    Leicestershire
    Posts
    19,126
    ........A blonde heard that baths in milk would make her beautiful. She left a note for her milkman to leave 25 gallons of milk.
    When the milkman read the note, he felt there must be a mistake. He thought she probably meant 2.5 gallons.
    So he knocked on the door to clarify the point.
    The blonde came to the door and the milkman said, "I found your
    note asking me to leave 25 gallons of milk.
    Did you mean 2.5 gallons?"
    The blonde said,
    "No, I want 25 gallons. I'm going to fill my bathtub up with milk and take a milk bath so I can look young and beautiful again."
    The milkman asked, "Do you want it pasteurized?"
    Wait for it
    The blonde said,
    "No, just up to my tits ...
    I can splash it on my eyes if I need to!"
    XF replaced by a big tractor due to intransigence of Jaguar marketing. A V6 engine and a Portfolio interior are now mutually exclusive if you live in the UK, but not elsewhere.

    Old lives matter!

  11. #3530
    Senior member OBC John's Avatar
    Join Date
    9th Aug 2013
    Location
    Halesowen
    Posts
    8,108
    First name
    John
    Good grief Wilf. The old ones are the best, eh? A Benny Hill classic!!! (And I think he stole it from Bob Hope . . . . . )
    XF-S Portfolio in BLACK

  12. #3531
    Super Moderator wilf's Avatar
    Join Date
    3rd Jul 2012
    Location
    Leicestershire
    Posts
    19,126
    You can't beat a classic...............
    XF replaced by a big tractor due to intransigence of Jaguar marketing. A V6 engine and a Portfolio interior are now mutually exclusive if you live in the UK, but not elsewhere.

    Old lives matter!

  13. #3532
    Prodigious Member compo batty's Avatar
    Join Date
    2nd Jan 2017
    Location
    Under the stairs.
    Posts
    645
    " Political Correctness is a doctrine, fostered by a delusional, and promoted by an unscrupulous media, which holds forth the proposition that it is entirely possible to pick up a tyrd by the clean end". Jaguar Sovereign 1998 V8 4.0.

  14. #3533
    Senior member PsiFox's Avatar
    Join Date
    10th Aug 2015
    Location
    Lincolnshire
    Posts
    3,786
    First name
    Mark
    IMG_2074.JPG
    The orders at dominos were a bit unfortunate today.
    2014 XF Sportbrake 3.0 S Portfolio in Italian Racing Red with Black Pack and Redzone interior on 20 inch boots

  15. #3534
    Senior member PsiFox's Avatar
    Join Date
    10th Aug 2015
    Location
    Lincolnshire
    Posts
    3,786
    First name
    Mark
    2014 XF Sportbrake 3.0 S Portfolio in Italian Racing Red with Black Pack and Redzone interior on 20 inch boots

  16. #3535
    Super Moderator wilf's Avatar
    Join Date
    3rd Jul 2012
    Location
    Leicestershire
    Posts
    19,126
    Dirty boy!
    XF replaced by a big tractor due to intransigence of Jaguar marketing. A V6 engine and a Portfolio interior are now mutually exclusive if you live in the UK, but not elsewhere.

    Old lives matter!

  17. #3536
    Executive Member Ancill's Avatar
    Join Date
    16th Oct 2012
    Location
    Peterborough
    Posts
    19,215
    First name
    Dave

  18. #3537
    Active Member davetech's Avatar
    Join Date
    27th Jul 2016
    Location
    Wilts
    Posts
    164
    First name
    Dave
    T'would be inserted where the sun doesn't shine if it was mine.
    2012 PL 3.0D Black

  19. #3538
    Super Moderator wilf's Avatar
    Join Date
    3rd Jul 2012
    Location
    Leicestershire
    Posts
    19,126
    snow plough.jpgFor those of us that need help perambulating:
    XF replaced by a big tractor due to intransigence of Jaguar marketing. A V6 engine and a Portfolio interior are now mutually exclusive if you live in the UK, but not elsewhere.

    Old lives matter!

  20. #3539
    Active Member davetech's Avatar
    Join Date
    27th Jul 2016
    Location
    Wilts
    Posts
    164
    First name
    Dave
    Plough.jpg Prefer this beast.
    2012 PL 3.0D Black

  21. #3540
    Super Moderator wilf's Avatar
    Join Date
    3rd Jul 2012
    Location
    Leicestershire
    Posts
    19,126
    .
    Attached Images Attached Images
    XF replaced by a big tractor due to intransigence of Jaguar marketing. A V6 engine and a Portfolio interior are now mutually exclusive if you live in the UK, but not elsewhere.

    Old lives matter!


 
+ Reply to Thread

Quick Reply Quick Reply

Register Now

Please enter the name by which you would like to log-in and be known on this site.

Please enter a password for your user account. Note that passwords are case-sensitive.

Please enter a valid email address for yourself.

Please select your insurance company (Optional)

Log-in

Human Verification

In order to verify that you are a human and not a spam bot, please enter the answer into the following box below based on the instructions contained in the graphic.


Posting Permissions

  • You may post new threads
  • You may post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •